Perfect Strength

By Ashley Thomas I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me. Philippians 4:13. The word strength communicates to us a certain level of capability. It could include physical, mental, emotional or corporate capabilities. In scripture you would find the word "arm or hand" used repetitively as an imagery of strength. The arm or hand is capable of doing things that the other body parts just can't do. Just the other day, I had to open a very tightly shut lid. As you could imagine my whole face was contorting as I put my hands to unscrew the lid. When I found that it was a little more difficult than I anticipated and thankfully no one was looking, I put the whole bottle underneath the tap and ran hot water over it for a little while and of course it opened quite easily after that. No doubt I had to use my mind, but I would not have been able to get it done - if I did not put my hands to it. I know that this might seem as a simple illustration but I believe it has a far greater application for us who desire to walk in the ways of the Lord. If by far you are a weak person, you will find limitations to what you can and cannot do. That is why many when faced with certain challenges do not make an attempt at tackling certain matters. They are afraid that the task would be too difficult and would require more than they are capable of producing. There are many today in this world who are easily intimidated when pushed, they have a great sense of inadequacy and they bare the scars to prove it. Thankfully, the Word of God addresses this dilemma because throughout the scriptures you can find examples where people who were without strength did great things simply by placing their confidence in God. This is where the line is drawn, those who are without strength, know how helpless they truly are. They have no where to turn, they have their backs against the wall figuratively speaking. Yet the weakest person can be immensely strong when he turns to the Lord and no, you wouldn't find this kind of information in any kind of textbook. The Bible says that "through Christ who strengthen us, we are able to do all things". But some would say but there are so many things that I still can't do, how can I do all things? The answer lies in this important question, where does your confidence come from? Is it from your great talents and abilities, does it come from the high praise of others? If that's where you get your confidence from, you can never experience His strength. On the other hand, if you are weak and are incapable of doing certain things, you need to consider this truth. For the moment you acknowledge that you are weak and without strength and you look to the one who is your confidence and who is your strength, then my friend you have discovered the secret of "perfect strength". This is the truth that liberates every individual from despair. The weakest person can indeed be the strongest in Christ Jesus. For there is strength to those who look in anticipation for the Lord. Isaiah 40:31 "But those who wait on the Lord shall renew their strength, they shall mount up with wings like eagles, they shall run and not be weary, they shall walk and not faint." Amen! Ashley Thomas http://www.ariseshine.org.au is the lead pastor of an emerging church in Brisbane Australia and is the writer of Praise The Lord It's Friday a weekly article of life and encouragement. Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Ashley_Thomas http://EzineArticles.com/?Perfect-Strength&id=226355 bad credit student loan
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How to Save with a Prepaid Cell Phone

By [http://ezinearticles.com/?expert=Rick_C_Kern]Rick C Kern There are several Tricks to saving money on your Prepaid Cell Phone bills. Don't sign that long term contract. That long term cell phone contract makes you pay for service no matter how much you use it. Almost all the prepaid cell phone plans allow you to roll over your minutes, you will still have to pay a yearly or semimonthly payment to keep your phone active but if you move or decide you don't need a phone you can quit the service any time you want. Don't answer your phone. Often if I am near a land line I will not answer my cell phone and I will call whoever called me right back from a land line. I call this using your cell phone like a pager but it works fine for me. I use my prepaid phone to deliver messages not to talk for long periods. Text Message instead of calling. Often it will cost you one half a minute or one third of a minute to text a message. If you use texting to communicate and not for recreation it can be an easy inexpensive way to get a message to someone. With Tracfone the cost to text is different on different phones, some it costs .5 units in and .5 units out, some it is free to receive and .5 units out and some it is .3 units in and .3 units out. Don't sign up for voice mail on your phone. Voice mail is a great airtime waster. The time you spend accessing your voice mail will burn lots of prepaid minutes. Just use the phone number in caller ID and call them back. Some people will leave long winded voice messages and not really say anything. If you are good about calling people back it is not that inconvenient for people if they cannot leave a message. Put all the people you know into your contact file. This makes it really easy to know who is calling and whether or not to call them back. Don't put a large number of prepaid minutes on your phone. I find when I have a lot of minutes to use I use a lot more minutes. If I don't have much time left I will stretch it farther. Instead of burning money on cell phone minutes I would rather buy another six pack---Coca Cola of course. Buy minutes in larger quantities. This is the exact opposite of my last suggestion, with some Prepaid vendors you get a much better price per minute if you buy a large denomination. T-Mobile gives you a better deal if you spend $100 at one time. Tracfone also charges less for minutes if you buy in larger denominations. Use Tracfone Bonus Codes. Check out your new Prepaid Phone. Before installing a large number of minutes on your new phone use the phone a little. If you put a large number of minutes on your new phone and then discover that it does not get good coverage where you want to use it you will not be able to get a refund on the minutes. Most of the prepaid companies will only refund your hardware purchase price not the phone services price. Get Voip phone services for your land line so all your long distance and local calls will be one price. Many people use their cell phone to make all their long distance phone calls and use up their minutes that way. If you use a prepaid cell phone your minutes will roll over so you don't need to use them up. A Voip land line can cost you less than $100 per year with a ton of free additional services included. Voip landlines are one of the best deals going in phone services. Often the land line Voip call is much easier to hear than with a cell phone. Rick C. Kern [http://www.compare-prepaid-cell-phones.com ] Compare Prepaid Cell Phones
Contract vs Prepaid Cell Phones
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Is America Sinking In A Vat Of Fat?

By Derek Brown What has happened to the superiority of the U.S.A. Remember being proud to be an American? Remember when the brunt of comedians jokes were the French and the English? Now they taunt jokes such as "land of the free, home of the brave? More like Land of the fat, home of the whopper! We have have POOR fat people!" Now THAT's embarrassing! Obesity is making the headlines in every state of our country. Current statistics place 64 percent of the adult population within some definition of obesity, from overweight to morbid obesity. Women and men are about equally represented (64.5 million women, 65.1 million men) in the 129.5 million American adults who are overweight. Nearly 62 percent of women and 67 percent of men are overweight. These statistics mean that less than half of the American adult population is of a healthy weight! So, how many Americans are obese? About one-third of adult Americans: 34.7 million (33.4 percent) of women and 26.6 million (27.5 percent) of men. This year roughly 400,000 Americans will die from obesity related problems. Obesity in the U.S. has reached epidemic proportions in the last twenty years and will soon replace tobacco as the leading cause of preventable death. Even more troubling news points out that obesity is not discriminatory. Obesity in children has doubled since the early eighties. How could this happen? Obese people feel unwelcome in public. We know that our bodies will overflow the standard size seats on airplanes, in movie theaters, in public auditoriums, and at the opera. The narrow seats of school bleachers, church pews and park benches are uncomfortable and crowded places. Fat people don't need to be reminded that they have a problem. Overweight people are rarely happy about their obesity. We have mirrors and bathroom scales like other people do. Obesity affects more than health. These are some of the effects of obesity: poor health, guilt, self-loathing, embarrassment, low energy, and social isolation. These issues, these feeling obviously add to the problem. As eating brings comfort, these effects fuel the desire for eating, which heightens the feelings of quilt, embarassment, etc., and, well, you get the rest. They are among the many topics discussed on a new site constructed from the expertise of trusted attitude weight loss designer Susan Richardson, and brought to life by online content engineer Storme Brown. "...we are food addicts. Both on a psychological and a physiological level. And we need to be realistic about this..." Says Susan Richardson when asked what she contributes to be the main problem with the state of America. "We need to first condition our brains, our attitudes, and our self judgement." Children, teens and adults who are overweight often feel isolated and lonely. Some of us are outgoing, compensating for what we perceive to be a lack of physical appeal. We are often willing to give more time and attention to others than we get back for themselves. "We have to realize that we are worth it" Ms. Richardson Adds, "and develop a vision of that beautiful, healthy, person that is inside of us waiting to emerge. We have to turn the attention back to ourselves." Taking part in a weight loss support group can provide a sense of community and support that you won't get attempting to lose weight by yourself. These groups offer a place for people who share similar joys and trials about losing weight and look at changing behavior as motivation for losing weight. With the high percentage of access to the internet, the ability to join and take part in a good support group has become as easy as a click. emergeweightloss.com offers support group activities in a bulletin board, "ask the expert", and live chat format. It can be of great comfort and motivation to realize that you are not alone and that what you are feeling (or not feeling) has been encountered, and conquered. The advantage of this program is the availability of 24-hour crisis help, a variety of menus and food suggestions, chat rooms made up of kindred spirits, and access to charts showing your progress. "This site, this program, Emerge! is dedicated to taking you down the RIGHT path." Susan offers "It doesn't matter what you did yesterday, IT'S WHAT YOU DO NEXT THAT COUNTS!" susan.richardson@emergeweightloss.com
http://www.emergeweightloss.com
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Martial Arts Marketing & Advertising

By Lee Mainprize Are your referrals getting a little stale? A Referral Contest or Rewards can be a great way to kick start your referrals and create some excitement in your school. Sometimes students need an incentive to refer someone, we're all different and get excited by different things. Giving your students an incentive creates a Win Win opportunity, you get a new student and they receive a gift. Music Voucher Gift Idea Offer your students a 10 music voucher for every student they refer that enrolls into your school. 1.Open the Music Voucher poster in marketing downloads section 2. Insert the value of the music vouchers you are offering i.e. 10 and your school name 3. Print out posters to display or use as flyers and give out to all your students 4. Tell your students about it in class ask who would like some trial passes! 5. Award gift vouchers in class so all your students can see (purchase vouchers from your local store) Mention in class John got X cd or ask Jon what CD did you get with your voucher? as often as possible! Run for 2-3 months You will also need to combine this with externally referring potential students yourself, start by giving out 100 guest passes per week by visiting local businesses,hand out passes in your town centre or maul and hold school talks too. You can tap into a vast amount of marketing resources @ www.MAinstructor.com Lee Mainprize is a martial arts business expert and founder of http://www.mainstructor.com "the ultimate instructors tool." Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Lee_Mainprize http://EzineArticles.com/?Martial-Arts-Marketing-and-Advertising&id=209455 instant bad credit personal loans
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Pornography Addiction: What Can a Wife Do?

By Angie Lewis First of all, don't give up on your marriage! Porn addiction doesn't have to mean the end to marriage. In fact, it is time to nurture your marriage with the tender loving care it so needs and deserves. You can actually learn from this and have a better marriage over it. I encourage you to put forth every effort to reinforce the bonds of trust and love that may have been broken between you and your husband. The moral outcome of a husband viewing pornography does not only affect him but the wife as well. A wife may feel unloved, invalidated, and sexually unattractive. "Why doesn't he want sex with me anymore? Why does he look at all those gorgeous naked women? What's wrong with me?" Nothing at all is wrong with you! This problem has NOTHING to do with you. It is your husband's problem. Don't make yourself feel victimized by this issue in your marriage. Your husband is looking at porn and acting out sexually because of an underlying problem within his inner awareness that is still haunting him. He may not even be aware of it himself. Most likely your husbands porn addiction is caused by something unpleasant that happened to him in his childhood that is manifesting itself within his mind. He may be feeling anguish over his past and for a temporary "feel better" fix your husband is acting out his emotional pain and feelings of grief through the use of porn. It makes him feel better emotionally and mentally. The "fix" for your marriage is to figure out what the underlying cause of your husbands emotional suffering is so you can find ways in which to make him feel better about himself through upright and moral objectives rather than through the use of lustful imagery. This mission can be accomplished with the help of God and with your loving support. Is your husband trying to quit his addiction? Is he willing to repent for his actions and seek God for a healthy spiritual mind? If he is ready and willing to make the effort to work on himself and the marriage then he needs your support now more than ever! You should make every effort to help him through this demoralizing time in his life. Be strong for him but guide him through it so he will not feel alone in this endeavor. Don't blame yourself for this happening in your marriage. Have the faith to know that you both can overcome this imbalance in your marriage with the help of God on your side! Your husband's self esteem is probably at its all time low right now because of what the addiction has done to him mentally and spiritually. The battle for him is he really thinks he cannot stop looking at porn. He thinks he NEEDS it. It's like an alcoholic who thinks he really NEEDS a drink. The thought of not having that drink (fix) is terrifying. I know this, I was there. As with any addiction there is an underlying emotional battle waging war within the addicted person. Don't expect anything from him in the bedroom for while. Realize that the addiction has messed up his arousal department for a short time. But don't worry because it wont last long. Do not demean or poke fun over this or you will make things worse for him. It is not because you are not sexy or that he doesn't love you. Remember, this is your husbands problem, not yours. Let your husband tell you when he is ready for sexual intercourse. In the meantime, the best way to be supportive in this area is to be patient and loving. 1. Try to help your husband to open up to you and find out what the underlying reason for the addiction is. Be open and honest by communicating your feelings properly and carefully. Be gentle and sweet instead of blaming and accusatory. This will only shut him down. An alcoholic is addicted to alcohol and the symptoms are drinking. A sexually addicted person is addicted to sex and the symptoms are the acting out part of it. As with the alcoholic, there is an underlying problem that causes the alcoholic to drink and or the sexually addicted person to act out in lustful ways. 2. Remove everything in the home that would be sexually tempting and or invite sexual visual stimuli. Put a filter on the computer or stow it away in a closet temporarily until your husband feels he doesn't need to act out sexually. 3. Reinforce your husband's self worth everyday. Do things together that would help him to get his mind off of lustful stimuli and sexual imagery. Encourage him and give him hope. Search for success stories on the Internet and print them out for your husband to read. Let him know that he is not alone. Your husband and you can conquer porn addiction together WITH the help of God. 4. This is the most important aspect of recovery, after recognizing the underlying cause; seek out God's will for your troubles. Study, learn, and research the bible together. Read out loud to each other different passages. Move yourselves closer to having a personal relationship with Jesus Christ and He will help your husband from being tempted. Blessed is the man who preserves under trial, because when he has stood the test, he will receive the crown of life that God promised to those who love him. James 1:12 You can still love and support your husband. Tell him you love him but that you don't like the addiction in him. This gets him to see that he is a separate person from the sexual addict, and that he doesnt NEED it. Some husband's are still in denial that there is even a problem, but when you separate the addict from the person, he understands that the addiction is NOT really who he is or what he can become in life. He is a child of God; therefore the addiction comes from satan. He needs to fight it, that's all! 5. When the time comes and your husband is ready to have intercourse do not have high expectations. Take things slow and expect to be let down. If he cannot get an erection or keep an erection for very long let your husband know that you understand and it's okay. Eventually when there is no pressure to perform you husband will surprise you. Angie Lewis is the author of two marriage books.
"Journey on the Roads Less Traveled", a book about love, life, addiction, and marriage. "Love The Man Your Married. This book tackles areas in marriage that couples need to know and understand and apply for a successful marriage. This book is a most reliable resource for married couples, from infidelity issues to complete forgiveness. For more information on these books visit Angie's website and signup for the free monthly newsletter while you're there! http://www.heavenministries.com Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Angie_Lewis http://EzineArticles.com/?Pornography-Addiction:-What-Can-a-Wife-Do?&id=177912 how can i find payday loans addresses
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How To Rebuilt Trust In A Marriage

By Mort Fertel If a marriage has problems, the chances are good that trust has been broken. And yet, trust is a central component for a successful marriage. So how do you restore broken trust? And how do you do it without spending months in marriage counseling? Trust can be broken in so many ways. The most common culprits are an affair, hidden addictions, lying, and financial secrecy. But if you look deep into the heart of a distrusting spouse, it goes beyond the usual trust busters. Trust is weakened in a relationship when a spouse is frequently late, unreliable, or insensitive. Hiding a few empty beer cans can damage trust between you. It doesnt take much to shake trust. But it sure takes a lot to rebuild it! We live in a microwave world of fast food, express delivery, and speedy-print. And so we figure, if we lost trust in an instant, there must be a way to rebuild it in an instant too. NOT! Trust is built one small step at a time. Theres no other way. Theres no Herculean event that can deliver instant-trust. In fact, by definition, trust is about CONSISTENCY. Thats what it means to trust someoneto be able to PREDICT their behavior. Predictability is a function of repetition. Repetition comes with TIME. Think about it. When you trust someone, it means you can RELY on them. But before you can rely on someone, you must depend on them time and again and NOT be disappointed. If youre disappointed, even once, the trust is broken. I often compare the building of a relationship to the building of a houseboth happen one brick at a time. And every brick is significant because it strengthens the foundation. The stronger the foundation, the more room you have for error. For example, how damaging is it to ruin one brick when youre working on the 3rd floor of a house? Its no big deal, right? You have a strong foundation, the house is in tact, you clean up the mess, and you build on. Its like that in a relationship. If you have a strong foundation, you can make a mistake without ruining everything. Its no big deal. You can move on. But trust is DIFFERENT. One mistake kills you. Because trust is about CONSISTENCY. Building trust is NOT analogous to building a house; its more like climbing a ladder. You dont have a foundation to support you. If you slip, you fall all the way to the bottom. Thats how trust works. Its unforgiving. So if youre trying to restore trust in your marriage, and youre expected to meet your spouse for dinner before your marriage counseling appointment at 6:15PM, dont arrive at 6:19PM. For you, 6:19PM might be a matter of 4 minutes and no big deal. But to your spouse it might be about reliability, and you may have just slipped all the way to the bottom. You just broke whatever pattern of consistency you built prior to arriving late. And now you have to start all over again. How do you rebuild trust? You make and keep promises. Make and keep. Make and keep. Make and keep. Over and over again. AND DONT MISS! Nothing destroys trust faster than making and BREAKING a promise. To be consistent (to build trust), you need lots of opportunities to come-through. So create them for yourself. Honey, Ill pick up some milk before I come home. And then do it! Ill meet you at our marriage counseling appointment at 9AM. And then do it! Ill read it by tomorrow. And then do it! Ill say it differently next time. And then do it! Look for opportunities to make and keep promises. Thats your opportunity to build trust. Like a ladderclimb one rung at a time. It takes time. Theres no short-cut. And you cant slip. You have to stay focused. And just to be clear, the little things count big. If trust is about consistency, then it doesnt matter what you promise. Just promise and come through. Dont think that just because trust came crashing down in one dramatic event (an affair or whatever) that you have to reestablish it with one dramatic event too. You can rebuild trust by making and keeping SMALL promises over an extended period of time.
Would you like more counsel? Subscribe to my FREE marriage help email service. Over 75,000 each year subscribe to receive the free report "7 Secrets for Fixing Your Marriage." This advice alone will begin to change your marriage. And youll also get 5 free marriage assessments and more information about Marriage Fitness with Mort Fertel. There are no strings attached. You can sign up for free by visiting www.MarriageMax.com. http://marriagemax.com/ Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Mort_Fertel http://EzineArticles.com/?How-To-Rebuilt-Trust-In-A-Marriage&id=245874 where can i get a 3000 loan with bad credit
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Walking on Egg Shells !

By Dorothy Lafrinere Walking on egg shells! Has anyone ever told you, that's how they feel around you? If they have, it's a huge red flag and one that should not be ignored. It needs to be dealt with immediately. Relationships are a tough challenging part of our lives. Especially when dealing with matters of the heart. As truly good as they make you feel, they can in turn tear you apart from the inside in a heartbeat. When the red flags start to rise up, that's when your relationship is crying out for help. You need to address it, as if a baby was crying out to you. When someone says they feel like they are walking on egg shells, what is that telling you? It's telling you : that they can no longer be themselves in your presence.
that they fear your reaction whenever they speak.
that they are stuck, that they cannot move in either direction, for fear of upsetting you. It is also telling you that they need to stop this feeling that is tearing them apart. Many of us are guilty for causing these prison bars that surround our loved ones. We do not even realize that our own fears are doing this to them. We are so caught up in ourselves that we are blind to the world that we have created for them. Through our own fears we hear what they say in all the wrong languages. We interpret them through our weaknesses and turn what they say all upside down. Some of us react irrationally, forcing our partner to either take cover and hide or even worse become irrational themselves. This is when we both become deaf and blind. When the relationship war begins, there are no winners, only victims. What once was love, kisses and smiles has turned into an ugly vicious battle ground of snarls, hate, and searching for the lowest hit we can aim for. Wow, how does this happen so fast? We as humans are notorious for ruining so many very good things out of pure bad habits. No one wants to lose or be the one saying, "I am sorry" every five minutes, nor should a real relationship become a win/lose situation either. Who wants to walk on egg shells? Then again, no one wants to have to defend their every breathe to someone they thought loved them unconditionally and are committed to. Walking on egg shells sucks! If we cannot be ourselves with the one we love, then who can we be that with? This is not to say that a person should disrespect the other. When you know that something troubles the other person or makes them feel truly uncomfortable, it should go without saying that it is just not done. That is true respect. Why would you want to do something to hurt your best friend or even make your loved one feel out of place? In new relationships it does take time to get things organized as in any new situation. Moving into a new house, a new job, having a baby, or even planning a trip, we have to reorganize to accommodate our now lives. Committing to another person is just the beginning of the book. It is just the title. Now you have to write the story and yes, make a few corrections along the way on both parts, but the trick is to constantly compare each others notes. Remember this: staying on the same page is what your relationship is all about. When we make a commitment to another person through love, we are taking on a responsibility to share our love and life with that person. We are silently telling them that we are now going to take in consideration their feelings as well as our own. Your once single-self life has now become a two-self life. This does not mean that you stop breathing and living. It just means that you are now sharing your life with this chosen person. It opens up a whole new world of respect. Remember also that you cannot gain respect if you do not offer respect. Life becomes a definite two-way street when two hearts are involved. There are also two minds working in this relationship now; two minds that are of opposite genders, two minds that will collide now and then. This is not a bad thing. We need to have differences to add spice to our lives. Be very careful of starting the "Poor Me", habit. This is another relationship red flag to watch for. Remember, walking on egg shells? If one partner becomes so caught up in their own worries and fails to share this with their partner, it will sneak in between you both and begin to build a very strong wall of negative habits. If you have read any of my other articles, you will know these negative habits well, jealousy, mistrust, low self-esteem and total loneliness. When your partner begins to feel they are slipping away from you, grab on and do not for a minute take that red flag for granted. Listen hard to their worries and love them more, not necessarily better. Just show more of your love. If they keep slipping away, then there is either nothing left to save or they need help outside of your relationship. It is so important to know your partner. Only then can you realize when they are in trouble. Do not allow your relationship to become the wallpaper in your house. No one wants to be a wallflower. No one with any self-respect that is. Another great phrase I hear all the time is, "Door Mat syndrome". Oh this is a very bad thing for couples to allow to take hold of their relationship. In many cases one partner has taken hold of it and falls into a control habit. This is something that plagues many relationships. When does one partner become the owner? I will use that word because it shows possession and control. This happens because it can. Some one has allowed this ownership to take place. STOP allowing this, please. A partnership, relationship, commitment, whatever you want to call it, is an EQUAL understanding of respect and love. There are no owners and no bosses. No one is above the other. Man should respect woman and vice-verse. This is a must in order to make a relationship strong enough to not allow negative habits any control. When there are no negative habits, there is no walking on eggshells. How much more simpler can it get. We are an intelligent species, so let us act intelligent when we decide to commit to another person. This is two lives we are dealing with here, not just another Hollywood movie. We are all going to age and all of us are going to notice our body parts going south. Guess what, no one is above that law. When you have found a true love, and are willing to invest your life with that person, please do not allow material things or negative fantasy ideals to come between you. It really is not worth it. When you feel unsure of something ,or you feel negative emotions taking control of your mind, reach out to your partner. Don't walk on egg shells. Do not turn it into a war against your partner. Use all of your love to fight the negative relationship habits. Love is worth it. We all have our good and bad days. Some have more than others. So when it's a good day, then make it a really good day. Those are always remembered the longest. Don't walk on egg shells. We have to love ourselves first, then and only then can we love another! Tell each other often what you saw in each other, what you see now. Being reminded why we are "The One" helps us to act that way. -Toni Sciarra Poynter Dorothy Lafrinere
Owner/Operator
Website- http://www.womensselfesteem.com
Weblog- http://www.justblogme.com/Dorothy
Forum- http://womenselfesteem.proboards29.com
email- dorothy@womensselfesteem.com Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Dorothy_Lafrinere http://EzineArticles.com/?Walking-on-Egg-Shells-!&id=82670 payday loan bbb
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Ending Relationships - Should I Stay or Should I Go?

By Michael Myerscough Should you stay with your partner or leave them? Is all the pain you suffer in your relationship worth it for the good times you have together? Will it really be worth all the pain of leaving them or is it better to stay and stick it out? In most relationships there comes a point when you have to decide whether your partner really has the qualities you need to stay together. Making the decision to stay or go is almost always a very painful and confusing time as there generally isnt a quick fix or an easy answer to your questions. I have a friend in a fantastic relationship who taught me that if its hard work its probably not working. This was an alien concept to me. I come from a therapeutic background which can sometimes promote the feeling that if its not hard work its not worthwhile. Years ago I made it my mission to figure out what made relationships work; there seem to be two approaches one more successful than the other! Two Approaches to Relationships The first is dont expect too much from your relationship and it will work out just fine! Some things are always going to be problematic. So what if sex isnt so important to one of you? So what if one party cant be relied upon to keep their agreements? So what if you never get to go on the holidays you really want to go on because your partner hates to travel? This may well work for some but its just not in my nature. As far as Im concerned, good enough just isnt! The second approach is to insist on great chemistry; to find a partner who isnt perfect, but is perfect for you. The two primary areas you need to match up in are sexual chemistry and best friend chemistry. Youd think these two would be obvious to most people, but youd be wrong. People make compromises on these points very early on and then wonder why they spend the rest of their lives hurting. Great chemistry doesnt mean itll be easy all the time - that would be unnatural. It means that youre excited and committed enough to work through the glitches as they arise rather than let them stack up. A stack of resentments is so much easier to set fire to. Working Out Whether to Leave So the biggest piece of work I have clients do when they ask me to help them decide to stay or go is to get them to design their perfect partner. You may think this strange if youre already in a relationship - but its just as valid now as it is when youre single. So, what would be perfect for you? The things you should focus on as youre already in a relationship should be more emotional and behavioural in quality. Once youve sorted out what is perfect for you, you can start to ask yourself questions about your current partner to see if they meet up to your ideal. Does your loved one treat you with the level of respect you expect? Is he affectionate enough for you? Does she make enough time for you? These arent necessarily questions that apply to you. Ask yourself the questions that matter to you once youve worked out what ideal is for you. A couple more questions you may want to ponder - If twenty years from now your partner hadnt changed in any significant way, would you still be happy as their partner? Would you consider your life together to have been more about adventure or more about endurance? The strange thing is we often know what the problems will be in a relationship many years in advance. The only question is, when will you handle them? We all know the longer you leave them the more painful it gets. Work out now whether you should stay with your partner or leave them get a free, 9 page Should I Stay or Should I Go? report. http://www.therelationshipgym.com/should_I_stay.htm Its possibly THE most difficult decision you have to make in a relationship, so get all the help you can making it. Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Michael_Myerscough http://EzineArticles.com/?Ending-Relationships---Should-I-Stay-or-Should-I-Go?&id=131060 used car dealers in my area who except bad credit
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